Back when I was a military spouse, I so looked forward to the day when Dh would retire. Why? Well, there was the obvious. I wanted my husband home at night and on the weekends. After 25+ years, I was seriously DONE with separations. But, in addition to that, I desired to put down roots and be “home” – wherever it was that finally.
What did that mean to me, though?
Even as a child, my family moved often. The last sense of “home” I truly felt was when I was 7 or 8 years old, back when we still lived in the area of my origin, surrounded by close extended family (ie my grandparents, my aunt and uncle, my cousins)
My adult life, I’ve tried to find it.
Sometimes I succeeded. At times, making friends that became like family.
Others… not so much.
But, as a military family, we didn’t get the luxury of staying anywhere very long, and the close friends we had made while at a duty station, we had to tell “see you later”. And as much as I loved them, many of them, I never have seen again. Except from photos after connecting as friends on social media.
After retirement, we settled in a small little town.
It was what we thought we wanted, and maybe some of our family unit still do. Me? Well, after several years, I began to feel the, now, familiar beat of my gypsy heart. Whatever it was that I’d been searching for, I still hadn’t found in that small little town in Missouri.
Oh, for certain. There were some wonderful experiences there, and we met some wonderful people. As much as I did want that to be “the place” I was “meant to be”. It just wasn’t “it”.
So, now, we’ve been our newest location for little over a year.
We have the beach, and we’re really not that far from the mountains. Though, it is definitely a longer drive to the woods than the ocean.
We have extended family here. Something that we’ve not had in a long, long time. And will have one of our elder kiddos joining us in the not too distant future.
And I’ve made some friends that are “like family” already. (In some instances, I Know in my heart of Hearts that they have been family in lifetimes past. But, I won’t go too deeply into that notion. It might be too “woo woo” for some. At least for now.)
But, one thing I’ve found here that I haven’t experienced in a long time (a decade or more) is a sense of community. A real sense of it. One in which I really feel as though I and my family belong. One, in which we can be ourselves. ALL of ourselves and really feel accepted.
That is not to say that Dh hadn’t found that prior. I know he did. But, he has the sort of personality and being-ness (for lack of a better word) where he pretty much fits in wherever he goes. Me? Not entirely.
I AM too “woo woo” for some people. At least to my way of thinking and perceiving. And it’s a part of me that I have tended to hide from most others for many, many years now. Especially in the small, conservative town in which we used to live.
I’m certain I was burned as a witch in another lifetime, if not more than one. It was an experience I didn’t feel the need to relive, if even to be “roasted”. So, I kept that side of me on the down-low and restricted to home for many years. Or at the very least, the Internet.
Here, though… I’ve finally physically connected with my Tribe. The seekers, the healers, the energy “junkies”/workers.
No longer do I have to hide in the shadows.
And what’s even better… I now get to spend most of my “work” week hanging out in a good energy environment.
My dear friend/soul sister, Mona (owner and operator of Beautiful Mind), calls it her bubble.
This is a picture of Mona’s “bubble” and was taken last night as we prepared to kick of the Inner Warrior Weekend special event.
I’m quite familiar with energy, energy healing, and the effects that music has on my soul, but sound healing is a pretty new concept to me.
Last night, Mona led us through a meditation in which we connect our universal elements with those of the universe, itself. (After all we are one and the same.) And as she did so, one of the ladies in our community played the myriad of instruments pictured here.
At some point, we were “supposed” to do something… Address something with the Universal Source. Ask a question or something about our Purpose. Me? I was so far “out there” that I do remember a darn thing, but did “come back” when I was instructed to do so.
It truly was an amazing experience. Not only the meditation and vibrations I was able to experience, but the connections with others.
Part of me didn’t want to leave! The other? Well… It said “I’m tired and ready to go to bed.”
This morning, I’m up – bright and early – for Day #2 of the Inner Warrior Weekend, and it’s certain to be another great day!
I’ll be certain to tell you all about it!
It’s an amazing community I’ve connected with. I am SO grateful – after all this time – to have finally found it!